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How do you help your child overcome difficult times?

How do you help your child overcome difficult times?



Children can be traumatized by the images they see on TV. There are different methods by which parents can teach their children to analyze situations, to think mature and to keep calm. Some psychologists offer advice on how we determine children to understand the nature of events, to raise awareness of their feelings and to learn to master the risky moments in their lives.
Young people should be helped to ensure their own security when the elderly cannot protect them.
Here are some tips:
· Be sure of yourself!
Parents who panic cause a reaction similar to their children. It is best to keep your calm and prove self-control in a risky situation. If the young man feels that you are agitated then he will be very frightened and it will be quite difficult to communicate with him; calm can save you in a dangerous situation.
· Watch out for TV shows!
Parents who watch shocking images or watch violent movies in the same room as their children may be negatively impacted. Even when the young man is in another room, he often chooses to watch the same shows. The best method is to use alternative information channels: the newspaper or the internet.
· The child must feel safe!
Young children have a continuing need to be protected; they often hide behind their mother when they feel in danger. Parents need to assure them that nothing bad can happen to them. Young people can be scared when they hear of terrorist attacks; it is important to make them understand that the chances of being attacked are very small and that they are specific to areas where there are conflicts between people. An eloquent example is the flight by plane: the risk of a plane crashing is so small that this type of transport has not been banned. We can offer them examples of natural disasters and present them with solutions to protect themselves.
· Find out what young people think! Parents can ask their children what they think about the news they have heard. In this way they will discover how young people analyze the events, their reactions and the extent to which they feel threatened by the things they find out.
· Listen to their questions! When children are in danger, they ask a lot of things. Parents need to assure them that the best way to overcome a situation is to keep calm. At the same time, it is necessary to give them a sense of security and to show their desire to protect them. When the young man feels he has understood what is happening he will give up the questions.
· Find out what the child is feeling! Events that happen together can help you understand what your child is feeling. Don't hesitate to ask him why he reacts in a certain way.
· He reacts positively to his reactions!
If the young man is sad, scared or worried, parents must understand his feelings by expressing his concern for what he thinks and feels.
· Provide support and understanding! Children need to be hugged and made sure they are safe and that nothing bad can happen to them. Even if a certain situation was caused by their inattention, it is not advisable to dispute them.
· Pay attention to the messages you send! When your child has been following a shocking news and has become frightened, he will certainly not want to be left alone when he is asleep. It is normal to accept to sleep in the same bed with him but do not turn this occasion into a habit. The child may become even more frightened by believing that he or she has serious concerns. We must pay attention to the hidden messages we send. It would be normal to assure them that they are in perfect safety and that they do not suffer anything bad if they sleep alone.

Other tips


· Do not hide the truth!
There are some news that cannot be hidden. An example would be the September 11 attacks. The events that happened then were so widely publicized that it was almost impossible to hide them. The best solution is to explain the situation in such a way as to make them aware of its importance but to feel safe.
· Don't frighten them unnecessarily!
There are parents who ask their children to stay away from strangers or enter the house if they see an unknown car in the neighborhood. These young people risk developing abnormally and start to get very scared even in situations without any danger. It is important to tell them that they are bad people to be careful of but do not exaggerate with the rules in this regard.
· Be honest!
Children are very intelligent, curious and sensitive. If you lie to them to protect them they will become much more scared and lose their confidence in adults. Their fear will be heightened and it will be difficult to convince them that they are safe.
· Use the stories!
For thousands of years people have fought nightmares inventing beautiful stories about brave little heroes. Fairy tales are the best way to convey the safety of children and show them that anyone can overcome evil if they trust their own strengths.
· Don't change their lifestyle!
Even if unfortunate events have occurred, you should not change their schedule. Try as much as possible to get involved in their activities and allow them to impose their own wishes. For example, if a car accident occurred in the city, it does not mean that you never have to leave the house.
· Analyze the situation objectively!
If unexpected events, calamities or armed attacks occur that you have discussed with your children make sure that these moments did not contribute to other fears. Young people ask a lot more questions and avoid things they do not understand. Analyze how they perceived the situation and clear up the misunderstandings.
· Give them freedom of speech!
If you give them bad news you have to make them express their thoughts. Regardless of how they feel, children want to be heard and understood. If the young man feels that it is difficult for him to express himself then he must be stimulated to write down his impressions in a journal.
· Life goes on!
Show the children people who have gone through a painful but healing experience.
· Accept the advice of the specialists!
If you feel that you cannot give them the confidence they need, call a specialist.